My dear, devoted children!
Are you troubled? Lacking focus or direction? Constantly sober? Have no fear! All you need is your gypsy friend Zora to make your troubles vanish!
I have been on a journey for quite some time now and after much soul searching and liquor drinking I have returned to a place of leading the sweet and innocent ones on the paths of life.
That is right my friends, I say paths of life because their is no fixed journey, if someone tries to tell you different... run! For they do not have the blood of a seer! Our blood is a unique mixture of clairvoyance, wisdom, mystery and alcohol; yet we do not deny that there are some things that must be hidden from the stars.
Each day is a choice, and no one can take the steps but you. However, there are some things a gypsy knows and can predict. For example, all males wearing glittering t-shirts or jeans will have an ambiguous and very angry homosexual encounter, if only for a minute. It will likely be after consuming an average amount of flavored vodka, and will never be spoken of.
My pretties, please let us embark together on the journey onward. Prepare yourselves! Day drinkers will be heavily rewarded in the next life.
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